8/25/17 Beth’s car and finishing things…

Beth’s car needed break lines and pads and routers. I asked them to do the break lines and we would wait a week to do the brakes. Grandma took Beth to school, and I picked her up. Beth and I went over after school to get the car.
Beth has a lot going on but plays a lot and doesn’t finish anything. Now that she has graduated she needs to complete some things. She needs to get her car fixed and figure out which department of college she wants to be in. She needs to get letters of reference from her high school teachers. She is starting to frustrate me. School is starting soon and she doesn’t have anything done. So today I tried to figure out what means something to Beth. When I ask her to do things, it has no value to her, its things that I want done, she will only do things if she is finding value in it. She loves her car and needs gas money. She doesn’t work enough hours to buy gas. So I asked her, if she will give her list of accomplishments to three teachers I will give her a gas card. The teachers can take the list of her accomplishments and write letters of recommendation. This way the teachers don’t need to remember what each student was good at, the student provides the list. The teachers do this at her school for all of the students, then all of the students can have letters. The gas card needs to be something that I can afford so each gas card will have five dollars on it. She texted me right back that she has emailed the list to the teachers. I hope this works.

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8/16/17 Beth’s car…

When Beth showed up at moms she was sobbing. She said that her brakes had just gone out. She cried and cried. I hugged her until she calmed down. I moved her car out of the drive and back into it to see if it was really the brakes so that I could tell the garage. The brakes did work some but I needed to push all of the way to the floor to get the car to stop. We called my towing place. They said that they would be right over. Mom, Beth and I had time to talk while we waited for the tow truck. It is nice to have quiet time together. Actually mom and I talked and Beth played a game on her phone, but she was in the same room. The tow truck came. It was the same driver that came to tow my car from work, from Beth’s school, from my house and now Beth’s car from moms house. My car brakes a lot. Beth had gotten her things out of her car and had loaded them in into my car before the driver showed up. She was so sad, she had never had her car towed away before. We followed the driver to the garage in my car. I always like to have Beth, or any of my kids, in the front seat of the car, they talk more. I don’t even need to ask any questions, they just keep talking.
We got the car dropped off. I showed Beth how to write a note for the garage describing the problem. I had her put the garages phone number and the towing companies phone number in her phone. She was so sad to leave her car. I said that it was like when a parent takes their child to a friends house for the first time. The separation is tough, but you trust the people that the kids are with and when you pick them up, you can tell each other about the adventures that you have had. This made her feel better, that we trusted the people and that the car would come back to her. Beth is so independent, she needs a lot of friends, and the car is her key to the world. Mom is going to take Beth to work tomorrow.

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