11/14/17 responsibilities…

When the kids were all out of high school I was so glad to be getting past one responsibility. A few years ago, I had kids in college and high school and kids dating, and getting jobs and getting cars and talking about moving out. It was a lot for me to keep track of. In high school, it is the students responsibility to get the work done, but the parents have to go to the conferences if there is a problem. So… I always felt responsible and spent a lot of time asking, do you have any projects that are due, any reports, anything that you need from me? I also needed go be ready to drive them to events at school and with their friends. We had added on so many new areas that needed watched over and hadn’t taken any away. I was in overload. When Beth graduated, so many of my responsibilities left.
When we were at church the weekend after graduation they were talking about the summer retreat for the high school kids. I started thinking, did I sign Beth up? Does she have that weekend free? Then I realized, she is out of high school and won’t be going to this event. I was so relieved. It is like when the kids were toddlers and I would see a diaper commercial and panic, when did I buy diapers last, should we go tonight, then I would realize that my kids were past diapers, and a whole wave of relief washed over me, like there is something going on in the world and I was not responsible for it.
The kids did handle their responsibilities, and there was a light at the end of the tunnel, the date for graduation had been set, so I knew that responsibility from all of the high school events would be over soon. That helped, the hope of a better tomorrow. When the kids were little I was in a share group at church, it really helped to hear each week what the other parents were in the middle of at their house. Now that the kids are older, they are handling their own responsibilities and it is so nice to be able to watch them grow as adults.
What do you do when you have too many things going on at the same time?


11/9/17 writing and getting out of high school…

 I need to write more often. Maggie and I went for a walk in the woods, William and I met with the school counselor, Maggie and I went to a demonstration on carving arrowheads out of wood, the continuing saga of Beth’s Social Security card, the ferrets new hiding place for the cat food, the new clothes washer and the laundromat, the Minecraft update… …there is probably more but it is 11:12 at night and I am a morning person so this is all I can think of.
Beth has looked so happy since she got out of high school. Still young but standing up a little straighter after graduation. She looked like a weigh had been lifted off of her shoulders too. She worries a lot about things like I do. She can get an A minus on a test and worry about what it will do too her grades. She used to come home in grade school and say, mommy, I was so worried about my spelling test that we took in the morning that I couldn’t play at recess. She had known the words so well that she had them memorized by Wednesday of that week. We would then go over them on Friday morning and she would get an A. But she still worried. She still looked worried when she got home from school, knowing that she had passed. That is not to say that she got a lot of good grades, she really did know the work, but in kindergarten she was asked to be in the gifted group. Beth asked the other kids who were in it what it was like. They told her that it was different learning and puzzles and all that they did. She asked if it was after school, they said no that it was during free play time. So Beth decided that it was an extra class and refused to go. So all through school, Beth always threw away some of her work to keep her grades low so that she didn’t get put into the gifted program. Sometimes she threw away too many assignments and ended up in summer school. I told her to quit throwing her assignments away, she said no, and that she knew all of the work and shouldn’t have to go to summer school. She still had to go because her grades were so low. Now that she is out of high school, summer school is over.


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